Saturday, May 24, 2003

Dear Nina

dear nina,

it has been 5 years since you were gone,
i was left all alone to pick up the pieces,
i had my palm cut by the broken glasses many times,
it bled and i let it bleed,
i didn't nurse the bleeding palm,
i didn't see any reason for it since you were gone,
there's no one that care anymore,
why did you leave without goodbye,
does it make you smile to see me like this?
what have i done wrong?
did i let you down?
everywhere i go i think of you,
every girl that walks pass me seems to look like you,
so many things happened while you were gone,
it hurts very much Nina,
it really does,
we were the best of friends,
where are the promises that you have made?
i saw you last night, but you didn't even look at me,
it was a dream i have always had since you were gone,
i felt a knife piercing through my heart when you went away,
so many fingers pointed at me,
the sight of your blood haunts me,
it's becoming a nightmare,
my heart broke into pieces to see you there,
lying motionless, you didn't smile at me,
you looked so pale with less blood in your body,
your soul was gone and you looked empty,
i wonder if you would be okay in the next world,
i still think of you,
the smile on your face,
the laughter that sounds so funny,
i looked for you,
they told me you were gone,
you were never coming back,
i cried so many tears for you to come back,
i wanted to wake you up from your sleep,
they stopped me,
i feel so weak, so helpless,
where have all my strengths gone to?
i just wanted to tell you for the last time,
i miss you so much and it hurts so bad,
forgive me Nina, forgive me pleas

Friday, May 23, 2003

Anak

anak,
dimana engkau?
sudah tiada lagikah kasih sayang?
aku rindu untuk membelai,
rambut hitam lebat menjadi kebanggaan,
kerana aku ibu,
aku melahirkanmu,
menyusukanmu,
kerana engkau anak,
aku selalu mengenang,
engkau manja dan penuh ceria,
menjadi kegemaran kepada semua,
engkau bijak dan petah bercakap,
senyuman manis mengukir di bibir,
dimana kau sekarang anakku?
mengapa sepi tanpa berita?
aku sangat merindui,
tiada malam tiada siang,
aku mahu kau pulang,
kembalilah di sisi,
jangan biarkan aku terseksa,
hati hancur mendapat berita,
engkau pergi tanpa restu,
sanggup engkau anakku,
jiwa gelisah mengenangkan,
dimana silapnya?
kasih dan sayang kuberikan,
seperti air mengalir tiada hentinya,
bertungkus lumus membesarkanmu,
meminjam meminta jika tiada,
agar kau dapat sesuap nasi,
supaya tangisan kelaparan berhenti,
dikeji dihina, kerana selalu meminta,
aku terima, aku lakukan jua,
demi kau anakku, aku rela,
aku berdoa setiap hari,
agar ketemukan aku bersama kau,
semoga kita dapat kembalikan,
keriangan zaman silam,
berilah aku peluang itu,
sebelum aku pergi menghadapnya,
izinkan aku membelaimu,
kerana aku merinduimu,
dan kerana aku ibumu...

Bayangan Semalam

dalam kedinginan, aku kesepian,
senyuman di bibir menjadi santapan,
dalam siulan aku tenang merindui,
tinggal kenangan untuk diabadikan,
kita bertemu dan berpisah jua,
kembali aku ke zaman lalu,
mengenang ngenang peristiwa silam
dalam diam aku menangis,
terimbas kembali bayangan semalam,
berjalan perlahan di atas titi,
meniti hari yang tiada pasti,
hidup sepi mengenang diri,
siapalah aku insan kerdil,
hati dan perasaan dimain-mainkan,
mengapa sanggup dilakukan,
kita semua makhluk Tuhan,
engkau dan aku tiada bezanya,
terlerai sudah segala rahsia,
diri dikata pengemis cinta,
berkecai semua impian hati,
aku terima dengan reda,
menuju aku ke masa hadapan,
membawa sejarah dengan harapan.